The Gift of choice

Do you like to receive gifts? I think we all do. I remember as a child I loved gifts. As a young person I mostly received story books as gifts which helped me to be the dreamer I am today. But did I get to choose what I received as gifts? No, not at all. It was someone else’s choice most of the time.

Recently, I had this ah-ha…! moment in my life about giving the gift of choice to others. Of cause it was after an unpleasant conversation with one of my loved ones. Did I push them over the edge during the conversation? I think I did. Was it my place to tell them what I told them? May be. Did I have the best intentions in my heart? Of cause yes, I love them so much and I was trying to get them to do what I thought the best for them, and I was asked to give them space.

As adults we all tend to believe we know what’s best for us and for others. In most instances I think we do know what’s best. But sometimes we forget our loved ones have their own mindset, experiences, strengths and weaknesses and they are free to choose anything they want in their lives. If I haven’t walked in anyone’s shoes for a mile, I don’t think I can decide what’s best for them. Simply put, I do not know what they’ve been through (for real) or what their dream life looks like for them. So, the best gift you can give anyone in your life is to give them the gift of choice; let them choose what’s best for them. Even if that’s not what you want for them. (It’s really hard sometimes, I know.)

If they are in a bad situation or if they are stuck (in your opinion) it is ok to offer help and advice. We all need a friend, a confidante to pull us out of the rut and be our crying shoulder. But it doesn’t necessarily mean that they can do what we want them to do. It may be because the path we are offering is too hard for them, or they are not ready, or it may be it is not the right time. If you believe, we are on our own journey and the path will be shown to us at the right time and if you can let your loved ones choose what they want in life and still love them for who they are, that’s the best gift you can give them.

I know we all tend to worry a lot about our loved ones; will they make bad choices; will they stumble and be in a worst situation in life? May be, maybe not. We do not know what the future holds for us. If you can be there for your loved ones no matter what, like a beacon of light in a rough sea, your friends, family, your partner, kids and even your co-workers will know where to find you when they are in need. That’s also the best gift you can give yourself to be free of worry and unnecessary despair.

To wrap up, back to my little rift with my loved one, I choose to gift them the gift of choice and I made my peace with it. But am I at peace though? Not always. I worry about them still. But before I jump the gun and offer my two cents worth of brain again, I try to remind myself, I’ve already given them the gift of choice and that is “THEIR CHOICE”! It helps me to be at peace knowing all is well.

 If you are wondering, am I in good terms with my loved one now? Oh! it’s better than that. We sisters tend to argue a lot. But we patch up even faster. Because we know we are there for each other no matter what.

 Happy gifting everyone. xoxo

Beautiful Sunset - Little Rome - The Paradise